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Narcissism

His remark was on target, a precise incision
Piercing her soft tender heart, a gory vision
 
 
Where had their infinite mutual love slunk
Reservoirs of their affection dried, sunk?
 
 
Their romance was a much  touted affair
People spoke about it then, everywhere
 
 
The marriage and long guest list of VIPs
Ballroom reception and honeymoon trips
 
 
All were the talk of the town, a grand event
A frantic planning with lots of money spent
 
 
Soon all excitement subsided,  routine crept in
An uneventful life with work and play therein
 
 
Until one fine day,  they were visited by the stork
All concerned toasted and sang, popping the cork
 
 
The twins made a rocking entry rocking her boat
Attention was diverted from him, as was her wont

He resented time spent with babies and his resultant neglect
She was hard put to convince him babies needed her to protect

He was an only, rich child conditioned to be always number one
Thus he forgot paternal duties, blinded by selfish needs, rotten

Thwarted, he began to dislike his baby sons much to her chagrin
As mom, she was helpless, as lover she cringed at this, life’s tailspin

Blinded by his own neglect and imaginary slights he began to stay out
Her busy day flew in maternal duties and nights became total blackout

Finally matters came to a head,  he found love and attention in other arms
She was heartbroken,  then she The MOM took up cudgels like firearms

She returned home to her old nest with twins sleeping on her loving breast
Grandparents, friends rallied around like a fort, assured she will  top this test

Indomitable fighting spirit made her shine as mom, daughter and entrepreneur
Business thrived as the twins survived immersed in love, soon becoming mature

Role reversal took place and soon reins changed hands with change of guard
Twins were both level headed knowing well what real life and living were about

The old curmudgeon meanwhile was left alone as fair weather friends flew away
Full of shame he recalled now forgotten mistreated family in past he did betray

Repentance ate like a canker into his grieving soul as he lay dying, calling her name
His lament penetrated her soul, with twins she reached his bedside without any blame

Father n sons bid farewell, only one solitary paternal blessing worth a lifetime
She forgave all his trespasses as experience had taught her to live a life sublime

His final journey began where he was again the CYNOSURE of all weeping eyes
His departing soul thus rejoiced as this came to pass finally at his own demise!!!

 

A little neglect may breed great mischief:..for want of a nail the shoe was lost; for want of a shoe the horse was lost; and for want of a horse the rider was lost.
Benjamin Franklin, Poor Richard’s Almanack, 1758
Selfish persons are incapable of loving others, but they are not capable of loving themselves either. - Erich Fromm  American, Psychologist Quotes
Men are what their mother’s made them. Emerson, The Conduct of Life, 1860

As selfishness and complaint pervert the mind, so love with its joy clears and sharpens the vision. - Helen Keller American, Author Quotes
Pity the selfishness of lovers: it is brief, a forlorn hope; it is impossible.
Elizabeth Bowen Irish, Novelist Quotes
Maternity is on the face of it an unsociable experience. The selfishness that a woman has learned to stifle or to dissemble where she alone is concerned, blooms freely and unashamed on behalf of her offspring. - Emily James Putnam

Whoever loves becomes humble. Those who love have, so to speak, pawned a part of their narcissism. - Sigmund Freud Austrian, Psychologist

Relationships

Some give joy, some sadness
Some give love, some hatred
Some give affection, some disdain
Some infect, some shun
Some bind, some separate
Some nurture, some rupture
Some heal, some wound
Some enchant, some disenchant
Some attract, some distract
Some make fearless, some fearful
Some calm, some anger
Some give joie de vivre, some apathy
Some give fighting spirit, some resignation
Some give faith, some jealousy
Some give relief, some stress
Some give pleasure, some pain
Some excite, some leave cold
Some cool, some burn
Some give shivers, some sear
Some grow, some wither
Some progress, some stagnate
Some magnetize, some recoil,
Some invite, some resist
Some mesmerize, some repel
Some awaken, some hypnotize
Some accept, some agonize
Some adore, some bore
Some negotiate, some hedge
Some please, some jar
Some give, some receive
Some fly, some dive
Some elevate, some denigrate
Some encourage, some discourage
Some are light, some heavy
Some are real, some pseudo
Some are authentic, some flaky
Some are solid, some shaky
Some measure up, some disappoint
Life in sum total is an intricate cobweb
Of complex simple human relationships

 

Forgiveness is the oil of relationships.–Josh Mcdowell

 

Understand that you, yourself, are no more than the composite picture of all your thoughts and actions.  In your relationships with others, remember the basic and critically important rule: If you want to be  loved, be lovable. If you want respect, set a respectable example!
Denis Waitley 1933-, American Author, Speaker, Trainer, Peak Performance Expert

 

When you’re in a relationship, you’re always surrounded by a ring of circumstances…
joined together  by a wedding ring, or in a boxing ring.
Bob Seger American Musician, Singer

 

The glue that holds all relationships together — including the relationship
between the leader and the led is trust, and trust is based on integrity.
Brian Tracy American Trainer, Speaker, Author, Businessman

 

Relationships are like a dance, with visible energy racing back and forth
between partners. Some relationships are the slow, dark dance of death.
Colette Dowling 

It is the things in common that make relationships enjoyable,
but it is the little  differences that make them interesting.
Todd Ruthman

 

The quality of your life is the quality of your relationships.
Anthony Robbins,1960, American Author, Speaker, Peak Performance Expert / Consultant

 

When the body sinks into death, the essence of man is revealed. Man is a knot, a web, a mesh  into which relationships are tied. Only those relationships matter. The body is an old crock  that nobody will miss. I have never known a man to think of himself when dying. Never. -Antoine De Saint-Exupery, 1900-1944, French Aviator, Writer

 

The most important ingredient we put into any relationship is not what we say or what we do,  but what we are. And if our words and our actions come from superficial human relations techniques  (the Personality Ethic) rather than from our own inner core (the Character Ethic), others will sense  that duplicity. We simply won’t be able to create and sustain the foundation necessary for effective  interdependence.Lose/Win people bury a lot of feelings. And unexpressed feelings come forth later in  uglier ways. Psychosomatic illnesses often are the reincarnation of cumulative resentment, deep
 disappointment and disillusionment repressed by the Lose/Win mentality. Disproportionate rage or anger,  overreaction to minor provocation, and cynicism are other embodiments of suppressed emotion. People  who are constantly repressing, not transcending feelings toward a higher meaning find that it affects  the quality of their relationships with others.
Stephen R. Covey ,American Speaker, Trainer, Author of ”The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People”

 

Today we are faced with the preeminent fact that, if civilization is to survive, we must cultivate the science of human relationships… the ability of all peoples, of all kinds, to live together,in the same world, at peace.
Franklin D. Roosevelt, 1882-1945, Thirty-second President of the USA

 

Some of the biggest challenges in relationships come from the fact that most people enter a relationship in order to get something: they’re trying to find someone who’s going to make them feel good. In reality, the only way a relationship will last is if you see your relationship as a place that you go to give, and not a place that you go to take.
Anthony Robbins, 1960-, American Author, Speaker, Peak Performance Expert / Consultant

 

The ultimate test of a relationship is to disagree but to hold hands.- Alexandria Penney

We are never more discontented with others than when we are discontented with ourselves. -  Henri Frederic Amiel  1821-1881, Swiss Philosopher, Poet, Critic

 

A relationship, I think, is like a shark, you know? It has to constantly move forward or it dies.  And I think what we got on our hands is a dead shark.
Woody Allen 1935-, American Director, Screenwriter, Actor, Comedian

 

As a result of trying to solve the big problems we face in life, many of us end up sacrificing individual  relationships by doing things that we may consider as being small or insignificant at the time. This reminds  us of the George and Gracie routine where George asks Gracie, How do you cook a pot roast? She replied,
 I put both a big pot roast and a small pot roast in the oven. When the small one is burnt, the big one is  done just right! - Source Unknown      

 

It is explained that all relationships require a little give and take. This is untrue.
 Any partnership demands that we give and give and give and at the last, as we flop into
 our graves exhausted, we are told that we didn’t give enough.
Quentin Crisp  English, Writer Quotes

In human relationships, kindness and lies are worth a thousand truths.
Graham Greene British, Journalist Quotes

PS: having gone through the whole gamut in my relationships, I tried to pin them by penning them and above is the outcome :)  (what kind of relationships do you have ?)

Sandcastles

Childhood and sandcastle are akin with a short life span
Both to be relished fully as time and tide wait for no man

Teens come upon us suddenly making us spurt and sprout
Sandcastles too get better defined in these hands no doubt

Youth comes along merrily and emotions take front seat
Exploration n awareness bring love, quickening heartbeat   


dreams dreamed, sandcastles built
enjoyed living without any guilt

High on cloud nine, in gold palace fine
entwined by loving arms, blissful, divine

Throes of exquisite first raptures
brief glowing fireflies captured

embedded treasure trove of cherished memories
gleaming sun catchers of tender love’s trophies

open sesame gained easily alibaba treasures
all in palms of hand without tough measures

four hands touched created dreamy castle in sand
promising eternal love beneath blue sky and land

the ocean heard and laughed at this innocence
shaking in mirth sending riptides as hindrance

love nest of sandcastle gulped in many a stride
telltale signs remained not, on beach, woe betide

lost grandeur of what once had been
handful of promises with lovely sheen

warming and fanning eternal love flames
at the hearth of sandcastle’s fireplace

ensconced lovingly in mansion built on sandy stretch
passing meteor briefly held, joyful catch, unlatched

 

 

“A hero is one who digs the moat while you build your sand castle.” By Sylphia, from internet

Playful Puppies (a-z)

A
Best
Comrade
Drooling
Enduring
Frequently
Goofy
High jinks
Inundating
Jesting
Keeping
Limits
Mauling
Nudging
Openly
Pawing
Quieting
Rambunctiously
Stimulating
Thrills
Umbrella of love
Vigilantly providing
Watchful ever
Xtremely caring
Zealously protective
 
Not only is life a bitch, but it is always having puppies.
Adrienne Gusoff
Author Nationalities, Artist Quotes

 There is no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face.
Bern Williams
Author Nationalities, Musician Quotes

A puppy plays with every pup he meets, but an old dog has few associates.
Josh Billings
American, Comedian Quotes

There are all sorts of cute puppy dogs, but it doesn’t stop people from
 going out and buying Dobermans.
Angus Young
Scottish, Musician Quotes

Making Memories (Family Album)

First sighting
instant
Déjà vu
Transmigration
Osmosis
Merging
Making memories

 1,2,3,4..

Tough two knitting needles
Strong, upright, tensile, resilient
Yarns of love and trust hold tight
 The skeins of two colorful personas
 

Multi-hued crisscrossing mingling
Kaleidoscope like forming patterns

Intricate and unique pleasuring both
The onlookers and performers alike
Yet, unalike, as  involvements  are unalike
Betwixt memory makers n memory shakers
The woof and wharf of two lives’  fabrics
Takes on a unique blended designer beauty
Skilled cohabitation and masterful dance
In step, in sync, gracefully bending, pirouetting
Twirling,  nuzzling,  guzzling,  feeding
Merging, submerging, panicking, smiling
Living, loving, flying, jiving, diving, divining
Singing, winging, zinging, singeing, searing
Creating a very personal private memory bank
Enriched with coins of life well earned together
Spending from it lovingly, in bits and bytes
Storing in memory chips, in print and virtually
For progeny to enjoy and cherish in later life
As memory makers waltz  into horizon, for posterity

I cannot say good-bye to those whom I have grown to love,
 for the memories we have made will last a lifetime and never know a good-bye
Anonymous
 The difference between false memories and true ones is the same as for jewels:
 it is always the false ones that look the most real, the most brilliant.
Salvador Dali
Spanish, Artist Quotes
The one thing I need to leave behind is good memories.
Michael Landon
American, Actor Quotes
A life-long blessing for children is to fill them with warm memories of
 times together. Happy memories become treasures in the heart to pull
 out on the tough days of adulthood
Charlotte Davis Kasl
Author Nationalities, Politician Quotes

Chameleon

Her features were sculpted and defined
Her rippling hair dark and  straight lined
Her body erect, tall, shapely, untwined

She loved to sketch, paint and etch
Coloring her world with colors n such
Moods made them molten, intense much

Art and activism wise she was straight as an arrow
In these she knew her mind right through her marrow
All else made her heart flutter like a sparrow

She said words that were quite pleasing but light
Her promises were empty, such was her plight
She was often flaky and shaky, try as she might

She changed coloring to suit current company
Becoming charming or brash or downright funny
Like a blank canvas she donned colors for harmony

Thus she carries on in life trying to please one n all
Taking cues from those who have her in their thrall
Pleasing some, perplexing others, much to their gall

Showing her a mirror cannot be dared
Unconditional love forces she be spared
As this chameleon is much loved n cared

“We are like chameleons, we take our hue and the color of our moral character, from those
 who are around us.”
 John Locke quotes (English Philosopher who made great contributions in studies of politics,
 government and psychology. 1632-1704)
 “We are chameleons, and our partialities and prejudices change place with an easy and
 blessed facility, and we are soon wonted to the change and happy in it.”
 Mark Twain quotes (American Humorist, Writer and Lecturer. 1835-1910)

“A successful teacher needs: The education of a college president, The executive ability of a financier,
 The humility of a deacon, The adaptability of a chameleon, The hope of an optimist, The courage of a hero,
 The wisdom of a serpent, The gentleness”
: Teachers and teaching quotes.

“A chameleon does not leave one tree until he is sure of another”
 Arabian Proverb quotes

 Words are chameleons, which reflect the color of their environment.
Learned Hand, American, Judge Quotes

A divorce lawyer is a chameleon with a law book.
Marvin Mitchelson
American, Lawyer Quotes

Everybody in life is a chameleon.
Melanie Chisholm
English, Musician Quotes

I have a lot of chameleon qualities, I get very absorbed in my surroundings.
River Phoenix
American, Actor Quotes

Falling Star

To capture falling star derailed
My rising wishful hand failed

You captured the escaped tear sly 
Sneaking from the corner of my eye

Balanced on index finger, frowning at
My suppressed unshed tears drowning

It shone bright in the light of the moonbeam
Cooling my bruised hurting heart agleam

My maternal eyes lost in bravery try after try
You won hands down being more stoic than I

The receding back of our detached departing son
Weighed heavily on my unrequited love, stricken

Playing with fire, taking chances, is his game
He is a soldier and we fearful parents are lame

Weakened by overflowing love bursting at the seams
Cringing at his sorties in harm’s way with his teams

Upright emotionless he left without a single backward glance
Heartbreak saw him getting smaller n smaller in his upright stance

They are the pride of the nation
Patriotism is their party affiliation

We pray to the almighty to bring them all home safe
Love weakens and I cringe at my helplessness in rage

Bring them home safe
Please lord bring them safe

To capture falling star from sky derailed
My rising wishful hand must not fail

Must not fail
amen

If a man has been his mother’s undisputed darling he retains throughout life the triumphant
 feeling, the confidence in success, which not seldom brings actual success along with it.
Sigmund Freud, Austrian, Psychologist Quotes
Fathers and mothers have lost the idea that the highest aspiration they might have for their
 children is for them to be wise… specialized competence and success are all that they can imagine.
Allan Bloom, American, Philosopher Quotes
If I were hanged on the highest hill, Mother o’ mine, O mother o’ mine! I know whose love would
 follow me still Mother o’ mine, O mother o’ mine!
Rudyard Kipling, English, Writer Quotes

Build me a son, O Lord, who will be strong enough to know when he is weak, and brave enough to
 face himself when he is afraid, one who will be proud and unbending in honest defeat, and
 humble and gentle in victory.
Douglas MacArthur, American, Soldier Quotes
An ounce of mother is worth a pound of clergy
Rudyard Kipling, English, Writer Quotes
Mothers are the most instinctive philosophers
Harriet Beecher Stowe, American, Author Quotes

A man never sees all that his mother has been to him until it’s too
 late to let her know that he sees it.
William Dean Howells, American, Author Quotes
 
 

Ties (some random thoughts)

Ties
Their threads
Spread far and wide

Ties
Bind by love
Bind by duty

Ties
Given by blood
Given by self

Ties
Some sustain
Some break

Ties
Freedom to be, held loosely
Resilient, stay the course

Ties
Nurtured by mutual love and respect
Will bind, hold lifelong and beyond

Ties
Nurturing parent gardener
Mentoring teacher spiritual guide

Ties
Let fly high kite like
Delve deep, scuba diver

Ties
Lets tie self to self
Be one with soul

Ties
Lets bind self universally
Rivers joining the ocean

Ties
Their threads
Spread far and wide

Ties
Bind by love
Bind by duty

Ties
Given by blood
Given by self

Ties
Some sustain
Some break

 ties
ultimately-virtual or real
all unravel in death
The chains of love are never binding as when the links are made of gold.
Royall Tyler

Love is a binding force, by which another is joined to me and cherished by myself.
Thomas Aquinas
Author Nationalities, Comedian Quotes

No written law has ever been more binding than unwritten custom supported by popular opinion.
Carrie Chapman Catt
American, Activist Quotes

Women’s fashion is a subtle form of bondage. It’s men’s way of binding them. We put them in these tight, high-heeled shoes, we make them wear these tight clothes and we say they look sexy. But they’re actually tied up.
David Duchovny
American, Actor Quotes

Hate traps us by binding us too tightly to our adversary.
Milan Kundera
Czechoslovakian, Writer Quotes

The 8 Equities: Physical, Spiritual, Psychological, Intellectual, Emotional, Financial, Social and Family
Michael Vance
American Creativity Expert, Lecturer
 

The Breaking Point

Their world was shattered on Valentine’s day
changing it forever….

His presence became redundant and he was let go
Time like a millstone hung heavy on his hands
All his efforts towards usefulness came to naught
There was no glimmer of reprieve from any source
And his spirit began to sag..

All his beautiful children and grandchildren came over
visited him for a brief while and carried on with their lives
leaving him with time hanging heavily weighing him down
He felt compelled to earn for his financial survival
which also added to further frustration..

All his usual pursuits gave him no pleasure
he was disenchanted by it all and did not enjoy them
His personaility went through a sea change yet
His loving kith and kin had no idea, no inkling and
they were sublimely unaware of his grief..

He too never let out a hint of his inner turmoil n torment
Tethering it well in company and releasing it all when alone
His whole life and person were coming apart and he was clueless
How to fix his life even though he was a wizard fixerupper
There was no crazy glue to hold him together..

He arrived at the extreme step after all else had failed
Luckily his beloved wife was away and he was alone
After seeking forgivess from the Almighty
For this, his final trespass, he snuffed out his life
On valentine’s day, putting an end to his agony..

Leaving behind a painfully puzzled, bewildered, grief stricken
shell shocked family and stunned friends..
“Suicide is.. the sincerest form of criticism life gets”
Wilfred Sheed, The Good Word, 1978
 

Parenting

Hello…..
I am the acorn that you both eagerly planted 
I sprouted n peopled a world that you two wanted

You nurtured me in your unique style, giving things
And a conducive environment to spread my wings

Bored with lying horizontal and then to sliding on belly
I suddenly turned over to explore life on my fours blithely

You were very protective and made home safe with skill
Child proofing is okay but mama that took away my thrill

My view had much improved on seeing things on all four
Instead of looking only at the ceiling being unable to tour

Enjoying the world at the height of one half foot is quite okay
Mama, but when I stood up, my excitement doubled, I got to say

Now I run around on stubby legs and get into all kinds of scrapes
It vexes you, mama, but experiencing life firsthand, cannot be aped

Toddler days will be fine, kindergarten through high school
Will be a breeze, college will be a challenge but mama, am no fool

Just give me room to spread my branches in non claustrophobic air
Guiding me is okay but let me decide my own life as that is only fair

Set good examples at home first, to convince me of what is right from wrong
Double signals confuse me mama, as that will only make me headstrong

You have provided all that you had in your nature and you nurtured
Me to the best of your ability, giving me an environment that mattered

I have matured into a mighty oak, a force to be reckoned getting daily wise
Mama, this came to be because you did not stunt my growth with undue advice

I was your blessing and a gift from the benevolent god
It’s my turn to make you both happy n proud, AND this will be my jihad!!!

 

“An atmosphere of trust, love, and humor can nourish extraordinary human capacity. One key is authenticity: parents acting as people, not as roles.”
Marilyn Ferguson (0 - ____) 0 0
“In “”Words of Women Quotations for Success,”" by Power Dynamics Publishing, 1997

There is an education of the mind
Which all require and parents only start.
But there is training of a nobler kind
And that’s the education of the heart.
Lessons that are most difficult to give
Are Faith and Courage and the way to live
Edgar A. Guest (1881 - 1959) US “poet, journalist”
“In “”Inspiring Quotations,”" by Albert W. Wells, Jr., 1988.”

From your parents you learn love and laughter and how to put one foot before the other. But when books are opened you discover you have wings.
Helen Hayes (1900 - 1993) US actress
“”"On Reflection

“Children begin by loving their parents. After a time they judge them. Rarely, if ever, do they forgive them.”
Oscar Wilde (1856 - 1900) Anglo-Irish “playwright, novelist”
“Lord Illingworth, in “”A Woman of No Importance,”" act 2.”

Lifestyles and sex roles are passed from parents to children as inexorably as blue eyes or small feet.
Letty Cottin Pogrebin (0 - ____) US “writer, editor, columnist” “The debt of gratitude we owe our mother and father goes forward, not backward. What we owe our parents is the bill presented to us by our children.”
Nancy Friday (1937 - ____) US writer
“My Mother/ My Self, 1977

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Copyright © 2007 Bina Gupta Poetry